My friends, I need you to indulge me for a bit. Long-time readers of this blog will know that every now and then I have a bit of a crisis with my writing, and then I do some actual writing and it stops. This one is possibly a little more in depth than usual, though, so I’ll give you some dot-points about why I’m feeling down tonight. I hope it makes sense.
- During my undergraduate degree, I wrote very little for pleasure. A few small pieces of fanfiction, but that was it.
- I started a Master’s degree this year, so there’s a vague feeling in the back of my head the same thing will happen again.
- I have an assignment due a week from today and I’m still not entirely sure what I’m doing with it.
- Apart from uni, I’m also doing a musical at the moment. Sometimes we’re not required at all, but other times that’s a full two nights out of my week. And as we get closer, it will be busier.
- With the exception of NaNoWriMo last year, I have basically been on a rewriting/revising/editing cycle for the last 12-18 months. I haven’t really had that writing-solidly-on-a-new-idea rush and outpouring of words for a long time. This isn’t to say I’m not passionate about my existing characters, but there’s something about starting a new project.
- What made me realise the above point was the tinge of jealously when meeting with my writing group tonight. One of the other members has calculated that in a couple of weeks she’ll be finished her 2014 NaNo story. This is because she’s had that time to solidly work on it over the past few months.
- It also made me realise that until I get this piece of paper (I’m studying part time, so it’ll be the best part of four years), I’m unlikely to have that sort of time, except over mid-year breaks and summers.
- And on top of all that, what with AMCF being in post-writing stages and Unicorn Love being just about done, I’m having the I-don’t-have-any-new-ideas! freak-out, which is being made worse by the And-I-have-no-time-to-explore-new-ideas! freak-out.
My Internet was down last Wednesday, and since I wasn’t able to blog, I didn’t write myself goals for the week, even though I had proven the two weeks prior how much it helped. I’ve also been constantly tired lately, which isn’t helping. I actually really can’t wait until Easter, when I have Good Friday through to the following Wednesday off work. I have a terrible tendency to get obsessed with housework when I’m at home for long periods, but I have faith my partner will insist I relax for at least some of the time.
Anyway, so, goals for this week. Mostly I will be trying to concentrate on getting the paper written that I have due next Tuesday. I’m seeing a local production of Evita on Saturday so that will take a chunk out of my day, and I’ve got some church commitments which are going to take a larger chunk out of my Sunday morning than the regular service normally would. So I’m really going to have to try to work on this every night…
Thursday: Read relevant readings on Wattle. Makes notes.
Friday: Read collection development policies for the institutions I’m comparing in the assignment.
Saturday: (Morning) Make notes based on everything I’ve read and which angles I’m looking at. (Evening) Try to begin a first draft.
Sunday: Finish writing.
Monday: (I think I have My Fair Lady rehearsal)
Tuesday: Polish, proofread, etc.
Judging by this, it’s probably not going to be the greatest essay I’ve ever written, but as long as I turn in something, I should be all right.
I could say “no time for writing in amongst all that” but I saw a very helpful post on Twitter today, and I really think I ought to follow it.
When in doubt, just string some words together.
— Frank Scozzari (@ScozzariFrank) March 18, 2015
So I’m going to try! It’s 10pm, though, so for now, I’m off to bed!
6 thoughts on “#ROW80 – Don’t mind me, just having a bit of a crisis”
I kind of feel bad for liking this… I hope you get out of the doldrums soon. I know well the “I HAVE NO MORE IDEAS!” freak-out (in my experience, it passed after I drafted the end of my trilogy. I think I levelled up). Too many new ideas might be overwhelming to you if they came now, but I have no doubt that they will come!
Life is busy for you right now. Don’t let guilt at not writing weigh you down. The next story will find you, just as your other stories did.
Maybe it’s a good thing you’re going to have to focus on something other than writing for a while. Sometimes that helps you come up with ideas. Just don’t forget to write them down.
I have a slush file that I keep at hand on my desktop to put ideas that pop into my head. They accumulate until I have time or inclination to write and then they are not lost. Sometimes those seeds turn into great writing later.
I could never do what I am doing with my writing and get my master’s at the same time. I would have to focus on one or the other. Way to go, my oldest is just where you are, getting ready to get that piece of paper. She isn’t sure about her last assignment either but she keeps plugging and it looks promising that she will finish this year.
All best to you~!
That’s a lot to handle. I have been using my phone to string some words together in bed just before I fall asleep. It isn’t the best situation and I’ve dropped the phone on my face twice, but I have been adding a few hundred words each time I do it. Good luck from a ROW80 blog hoping friend.
I know how much it sucks to feel like you’re in a rut with your writing. I was there only a few months ago. Be patient. Be kind to yourself. And it probably won’t hurt to sit your other works aside for a while. I found that once I allowed myself to clear my older stuff from my head, the new ideas began popping up. 🙂