#WIPpet Wednesday – Make them see he’s not!

Hello there! I’m sorry I didn’t get around to many WIPpeteers this week, except that I’m kind of not because I was on holidays. 😛 It was just a quick trip away, Saturday – Tuesday, but it was lovely just hanging around, reading and writing and not worrying about housework or work or anything like that.

First order of business this week is the 250 Followers giveaway I hosted last week. I gave each comment on last week’s WIPpet post a number and then used a random number generator to determine the winner. And the winner is Celine JeanJean! Congrats! If you can either let me know you email address in a comment here or email it to fuzzyagent999[@]yahoo[dot]com[dot]au, I will get your $25 Amazon voucher to you as soon as I get paid next week.

On the writing front, I am on track with my goal to write a short piece of fiction for every day of December. You can scroll back through the past week and a half’s worth of posts to read all of those. There are a few I am particularly proud of, such as this one, which I am going to expand into a longer short story. You’ve got no idea how many Decembers have gone past and I have really wanted to write a Christmas story and been stuck for inspiration. Now I have no only the inspiration, but some ground work as well. (Incidentally, I have my partner, Edy, to thank for interpreting the prompt that way. I had simply been thinking of a young woman moving house. So yay Edy!)

For WIPpet Wednesday this week, I have a follow-up scene to last week’s. Josephine has convinced a couple of police officers of what she saw in Jean Trivette’s house, and so they’re trying to persuade his wife to testify against him. She says she wants to see Josephine and talk to her before she makes any decisions. This is their conversation. My WIPpet math is very simply 10 paragraphs for the 10th of December. Oh, and this is straight from the NaNo manuscript, so very likely riddled with errors.

When Josephine had first arrived at the police headquarters, she had been immediately taken behind the desk by the desk sergeant, and then passed on to another sergeant who led her through to the break room. Yvonne Trivette was there, a cup of coffee in her hand, and Josephine could not help but wince at the older woman’s black eye.

The sergeant closed the door behind them, but Josephine could still see his outline through the frosted glass.

Yvonne Trivette stood up and held a hand out to Jospehine. “Hello. I’m Yvonne.”

Josephine shook her hand. “Hello. I’m sorry about yesterday. I hope he didn’t hurt your further because of what I saw.”

“No, he left it at that yesterday.” Yvonne sat back down and beckoned for Josephine to sit on the cushion next to her. “The police said he hurt you, too.”

“Well, it wasn’t anything like he did to you.” Josephine rolled up her sleeve. “He just held on to me a little too tightly is all. But the marks are there.”

Yvonne Trivette looked away, biting her lip. “I’ve been telling myself that as long as he only does it to me, it’s all right,” she said. “Just as long as he doesn’t hurt our children. But when they said he had hurt you, that’s when I knew I had to talk to someone about it. I just… well, I wanted to check he really had hurt you before I did anything.”

“He is clearly hurting you, isn’t that bad enough? And he’s getting away with it! Everyone out there loves him! Even my friends wouldn’t believe me when I told them what I had seen!”

“He is rather the city’s darling boy,” Yvonne said ruefully.

“Then make them see that he’s not!”

Join us for WIPpet Wednesday by posting an excerpt from your current WIP that somehow relates to the date. Then link up with us here! We don’t bite. In fact, we’re really quite friendly and you should totally come along for the ride! I’m now heading to the shower and bed, since I have to return to work tomorrow. This week I should do a little better at visiting your posts. See you then!

~ Emily

20 thoughts on “#WIPpet Wednesday – Make them see he’s not!

  1. shanjeniah says:

    That last line – the desperation in it. i can feel Josephine willing Yvonne to see that she matters; that even if it’s ‘just her’, that’s one person too many.

    I hope they become friends, and that Yvonne remembers or learns for the first time that she matters, too…

    Sadly, this is far too common a story…

    On the other hand, I’m happy you got some time away – I’ve had a hard time getting around to visit, or even answer comments, since NaNo really got going. I’m finishing two novel drafts this month, though, and then I plan to really indulge in reading and interacting.

    I’m also determined to get round to everyone this week, even with our travel plans!!

    Like

    • Emily Witt says:

      When I re-visit this story in the new year, Yvonne is one character whom I want to play a much bigger. I really want to explore her relationship with her husband, and how they ended up in that situation, and then really pull her through that. I hope I can do that whole story justice.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Celine Jeanjean says:

    Oh, haha, I was all wrapped up in your WIPpet and I forgot about the earlier part where I’d won your competition – short attention span, moi? (definitely a good sign though if your writing makes people forget about other things)
    I emailed you earlier, thank you so much Emily, I’m so excited to have won! And congrats again on your 250 followers, it’s a big landmark!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. kathils says:

    Ah, now comes the hard part, tarnishing the reputation and character of someone held in high regard by the masses. I wish the women luck in their endeavor, I think they’re going to need it!

    Like

  4. Beth Camp says:

    I wonder if the police would let the two women talk before taking Josephine’s statement, but, that aside, I love the sense of compassion and commitment to protecting abused women that shapes this story. I can only echo what others have said: “Well done!”

    Like

    • Emily Witt says:

      That actually does get addressed later, when Josephine wants to stay with Yvonne afterwards while she makes her statement and the police won’t let her. Which is to say, that occurred to me after I’d written the scene and as it was NaNoWriMo, I addressed it such a way to add more words. 😛 How they actually come together to have this conversation is probably something I’ll tinker with in the new year to make it a bit more plausible.

      Like

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